They were perfect.They were meant for each other.It's just,some people disagree.Actually,I should say most people.Almost everyone the couple knew hated them for loving each other.But they are proud.They hold hands in school,hug each other,and even kiss.Not anything that'd get them suspended,or even expelled,of course.Just a small peck on the lips or cheek.But what happens when one of them lets the hate and teasing and bullying get to them?The boys' relationship becomes a train wreck,is what happens.The boy starts to smoke,and even drink,feeling guilty that he let the other get so hurt and broken.But he just breaks the younger boy even more,and he hates himself for that.Now,they are separate,or single.They had gotten into a fight because the older one was drinking underage and smoking so much it'd hurt your stomach just to watch.Now,everything is impossible...
I never thought that this could, or would have ever happened.I mean,I knew that we would have our ups and downs,especially since there were so many haters.But I never imagined that...That we would actually break up.I hurt him so badly and I couldn't stand to see him hurt,so I just said it was over.I wanted to explain to him that I couldn't protect him or make him as happy as others could,but he turned and ran away before I could get anything else out of my mouth.Those last words I had said to him haunt me."This won't work...It never has and never will...This has to end..Us...We have to end..." Gosh,everything seemed so..possible when I was around him.Now everything is just either to hard or...Too hard.It feels like I can't say or do anything without him.But I still drink and I still smoke.I hang around the wrong crowd,while he's broken inside.He might not show it,but I know his heart is in a million pieces.I can see it in his eyes whenever he glares at me in the hallway.
Because of me,because we broke up,he's bullied even more.And I don't so anything about it.I'm afraid that if I do held him,I'll just get pushed around by my "friends."I hate having the feeling of guilt in my stomach and my heart.It hurts so bad...Of course I can't tell anyone otherwise they'd think I still had feelings for him.They'd think I was a softy.Truth is I am a softy.I'm a big softy,on the inside.On the outside I'm just iron-hearted.Everyone thinks I'm a rude,cold bastard.But some people like it;most people do.So I have never helped my ex since the break up.Everyone thinks I'm so cool and bad,but really I'm not.I still have feelings for him,and I just want to cry.I only cry at home though.I know it's been about a month since we were single,but I still cry myself to sleep.
I growled when the sound of my alarm clock going off woke me.Today I turned nineteen.Yes,I am still in high school.Sorry that I'm a stupid-ass.I smashed my hand on the alarm clock,almost breaking it.I sat up in my bed,sitting Indian style.My head was hanging as I looked over to the beer bottle on the table next to my bed.I know,drinking is horrible,especially when you're underage.And especially when you drank too early.But I didn't care.It was one of the only things that helped me.I tiredly grabbed it and opened it,then took a couple gulps before my mom came stomping up and swung my door open.But before she did all that I had hid the beer bottle beside my bed where she couldn't see it."Get up,Adam.You have thirty minutes to get ready.The bus will be here in about forty,"she said with no expression,then stomped back down the stairs.Gosh,I hate her.She's my step-mother.She hates m,too,I can tell.
I just rolled my eyes and pushed myself off of my bed and up on my feet.I took a deep breath before grabbing a new pair of boxers,some blood-red skinny jeans and a darker shade of grey v-neck t-shirt.I let a yawn escape my mouth as I walked down the hall and to the bathroom.I groaned when hearing my baby step-sister scream,and hurried into the bathroom when hearing my step-mom's footsteps coming up the stairs.I locked the door after shutting it behind me,and walked over to the sink.I looked at myself in the mirror,running a hand through my dyed black hair.I looked down at the mirror,stopping where it stopped;at my waist.Gosh,I had to admit that I was skinny.I wasn't surprised,though.I didn't eat a whole lot,anymore.I used to be a pig when it came to food,but now I just...It's impossible to eat.Whenever I even think of food I feel like I have to vomit.
I quickly stripped myself of my boxers that I wore to bed last night and threw them into the dirty clothes basket.I slowly dressed myself,too tired and sick-feeling to do anything.After I got dressed I looked at myself in the mirror again.I had dark circles under my eyes,and I was as white as a fucking ghost.I just rolled my eyes,though,and ran my hands through my hair to comb out any knots or anything.Once I was done with that I walked over to the door and unlocked it,then pushed the door open.My step-sister's screaming had stopped,but I could hear my step-mom shushing her.I let out a silent sigh as I jogged down the staircase and into the kitchen.I grabbed my pack of smokes from the kitchen counter,and then my jacket.It was almost time for the bus to arrive.Gosh,it took me forever to get ready.I only had ten minutes till the bus came.It took me thirty minutes to get out of bed,find some clothes and put them on.Jeez...
I let another sigh escape my lips,waiting outside on my porch for the bus to come.I leaned against the railing that was attached to the stairs that led to our driveway.I had one hand on the railing,my ankles crossed,my jacket on,and my other hand holding a lit cigarette.I took a good,long drag,looking down at my backpack that I had left on the stairs last night.Guess I got a bit drunk last night,ha?Someone could have stolen my backpack,but everyone knows better than to mess with me.
It hurt just a little as the bus arrived and I got on,that no one said happy birthday to me.No one cared,anymore,though.When I was with..him...everyone shouted happy birthday to me.Even my step-mom.I guess now that I changed,my step-mom was mad at me and everyone was too scared to say a thing to me.Besides my "friends."I walked to the back,the cigarette that had been in my hand now on the ground outside of the bus.I sat down in the back seat and looked out the window as the bus driver took off to the another bus stop.I fiddled with my necklaces that had been given to me by my biological mother,no expression on my pale,tired face.Gosh,I was so tired,I couldn't think about anything.
I gripped my backpack tightly as the bus stopped,looking down at my black combat boots as he got on.I let a small,sad frown plaster on my face,but hid it well while looking down.
